I read a story that a woman had delivered a baby at only 18 weeks gestation. They couldn’t stop her bleeding or contractions. One doctor even had the nerve to suggest an abortion to stop the bleeding.
I really feel for this family. One doctor even opted for abortion. They had to give their baby a chance. When I found out I was pregnant (shocked me almost to death!) I had that moment when my brain flashed “have an abortion, no one will know!” Followed quickly by “I would know I couldn’t live with my self.” I am not saying that it is or isn’t anybody’s decision. After I made the decision I went through telling everybody that mattered to me. When my insurance said that I should have an amniocentesis, due to my age – 35. So I had it. They called the doctor on the other end of the line said “Did you want to know your babies sex? Oh, sorry it doesn’t matter your fetus has 47 XXY” no emotions nothing. All I heard was there was something wrong with my baby. I cried. They scheduled an appointment for a “consultation” . The person I talked to couldn’t give me very many answers. other than an extra chromosome. Suggesting I have an abortion. REALLY?!?! GOD and I had already had this conversation what in the hell made this person sitting across the table from me qualified to scare me and urge me to have an abortion? She suggested I have it done quickly to avoid any attachment issues. ATTACHMENT ISSUES?!?! I couldn’t be any more attached he is growing in my body as we spoke. My Mom asked questions that I hadn’t even thought of. “Do you know if the quality of life will be affected?” “well, no. we aren’t sure about that. We are doing research. But not much is known as of yet.” “Well, can you tell me the characteristic traits of this xxy?” “Well, they might have issues.” “What kind of issues?” Nobody seemed to know other than he might be larger than his peers. Or he may not be. He could have some learning issues, but then again he might not. When we (Mom and I) came out I was so angry and hurt. They said that it was a one in a thousand diagnosis. Well, I guess they must have done some further research because now the rate of 47 XXY births is over 2 in 100. Not the dire future that they tried to shove down my throat. I feel sorry for any woman who took their advise.
When I went back to work I was very upset. I felt like I would be delivering a three headed monster with fangs and hooves. A lady I worked with was trying to have a baby and I felt rather guilty. My pregnancy was let’s just say it was a shocker. When she came to my cubicle she could tell I was upset, I didn’t want to tell her. Here she was trying to have a baby and I was going to just POP one out.
I eventually told her about the XXY. It just kind of spilled. When she laughed I was hurt and she could see it. She apologized and explained. “That is the second time in a week that I have heard XXY. The first time was when my husband and I went for medical testing to see if there was some reason we weren’t getting pregnant. They found that my husband has an extra X.” I think it must have been the hormones or her laughter but I just started crying. I had met her husband and he seemed to be a nice guy. No third head, no fangs, no hooves. He was a firefighter if I remember right. He had gone through his whole life up to that point and never knew. Not that is is something to hide but when I tearfully explained to her what I had just sat through she gave me a much needed hug. And she eventually got pregnant. The problem was low sperm count they weren’t sure that it was XXY related or not.
My son is the light of my life. I can’t imagine a life without him. I think of women not having a baby because of something someone said, even a medical professional, is crazy. God moves in mysterious ways – I have heard that more than once. It is between God and me. The End and Amen.